Monday, May 31, 2010

From the vault: Brittany vs. Britney

The expiration of is just hours away. Here is another of my favorite pages from the site that I wish to keep.

It's the comparison chart between Brittany Spears, one of my other favorite characters, and Britney Spears. I originally composed this in 2007, so the ages are as of that time.

Full name

Britney Jean Spears

Brittany Lynnette Spears

HometownKentwood, Louisiana Beattyville, Kentucky


25 17
Music style Pop/R&B Bluegrass

Jamie and Lynne (estranged)

Blanton and Rebecca (happily married)
Husbands/boyfriendsMarried and divorced twice; two kids from second marriage Has a secret boyfriend (psst, it's Buddy Wayne Barefoot)
Career start Mickey Mouse Club Parents' basement
Signed by... Business manager Louis Pearlman Race car driver Buddy Wayne Barefoot
Debut album released1998 2007
Album title Hit Me Baby One More Time Tales of a Jillbilly
Backup performers Session acts (no names available) Brothers Bunch, Blanton and Bradshaw; sister Bailey; cousin Brashears
Intended audiencePop music lovers, horny men 18-49 The whole family!
Movie crossovers Starred in Crossroads (remember that?)None
Outrageous moments Shaving her hair bald, lesbian-kissing, going to a public bathroom barefoot, and so many more None (as far as we know)
Rehab visits Several (in one week!) None
Biggest professional problem Where does one begin? Her name on Wikipedia redirects to Britney's page
Overall image Girl gone wild Girl next door you want to marry
Does she exist? Yes (unfortunately!) No (unfortunately!)

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