Saturday, June 16, 2018

Gone Barefoot show summaries (re-issue of season 5)

I'm back on track to continue the revised journey.  By this point, you should notice some big changes in the show order.

#53 - Jan. 3, 2016: "Extreme Makeover Meadow Edition"
As this season begins, Popeye's brother Labell, his wife Allene, and all of their children need a new house to replace two trailer parks at which they have lived.  Needless to day, the project is huge and they need as much help as possible to build it. Popeye and Harvey waste no time in planning and building the entire project and dozens of family and friends jump on board in the Southern equivalent of a "barn raising."  Hambone, ever the tomboy, joins the crew that's otherwise all-male.
Meanwhile, Bryson makes his debut playing for the school's flag football team, and Pink and his wife Elinor show off all eight of their children, contrasting their daily lives with those of subsequent generations.
#54 - Jan. 10, 2016: "Move That Bus!"
Labell's new dwelling is finally ready!  There is a huge celebration that brings the extended Barefoot family together again.  B.W. sings and plays guitar, Hambone does an original performance called "Carolina Slappin'," Hambone's friend Bellamy Wood sings a country hit song, teacher Noah Barefoot reads poetry, and cousin Beth serves a huge cake.  "This is better than I ever could have imagined," marvels Labell.  (The entire episode is done as a tribute to Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, which aired on ABC from 2003 to 2012; the episode title has to do with how the finished projects were revealed.)
#55 - Jan. 17, 2016: "Ballroom Blitz"
The house descends on Lena Peacock's local ballroom-dancing school to celebrate the graduation of Brandy and her recital.  She is paired with Hylton Tripp, a man in his mid-20s from Greenville and a graduate from East Carolina University who commutes over two hours - one way! - from his house every day.  Through a video package, we meet Hylton and find out that he has a clear down-home lifestyle away from the dance floor.  Afterwards, everyone celebrates at the house where her parents and middle brother Blake live, about nine miles from where Brandy and Bunky live.
#56 - Jan. 24, 2016: "Indian Uprising"
When Harvey rejoined the Meadow Indians football team two years ago, it was near the bottom of the standings and hadn't won the conference championship in at least a decade.  Now, they take the field against the legendary quarterback Bud Strickland and Four Oaks, the dominant team in the area historically.  The outcome is shocking and historic: Not only do the Indians win, but Blake - the "quiet" brother of Brandy and Bunky - makes his own name by being the winning QB and putting up his best offensive numbers ever!  At halftime, Bunky debuts his new career as a one-man band, and afterwards, Benny - a family cousin - hosts a wild party.
#57 - Jan. 31, 2016: "Time Out for 'Bone"
Miss Hambone's unpredictable behavior causes B.W. to give her no choice but to suspend her from farm work indefinitely!  The last straw came when "Ellie" also got an infection due to B.W. forgetting to milk her; Hambone accepts her punishment, saying she did not have a real excuse.  Before that bombshell came, the Barefoot Boys have their first full performance at a church revival in nearby Bentonville, while the entire Barefoot Mommas' Club - 24 strong! - have a meeting and photo shoot.
#58 - Feb. 14, 2016: "Romantic Roundtable"
(There was no episode the previous week due to Super Bowl 50.)
In a special panel discussion, the couples of the cast speak about how they met, the ups and downs of their relationships, and share video highlights that have not been seen before on the network.  The couples are: Buddy Wayne and Brittany Spears, Bobby Ray and Jennifer, Popeye and Annie, and Beth (a cousin of B.W.'s and Bobby Ray's) and Trey Johnson.  At the end of the show, Beth and Trey unveil their adopted son, Jordan.
#59 - Feb. 28, 2016: "Heirloom"
(There was no episode the previous week due to the 88th Academy Awards.)
The Barefoot ladies complete their biggest job yet: a barn painted with two very large footprints.  It is part of a project underwritten by Johnston County in which most of the barns at family farms are given unique designs with geometric shapes and other elements usually found in quilts.  Also, Labell tries his luck in the famous hollering contest at Spivey's Corner, and Bunky professes his secret love for betaBOOZEbrain, a "clean punk rock" band.
#60 - Mar. 6, 2016: "Super Special"
In a departure, B.W. and Bobby Ray visit the real world to attend Super Bowl 50.  Both of them tied for the win in a National Football League-sponsored contest, so they come to the San Francisco Bay Area together and root for the opposite teams - B.W. the Broncos, Bobby the Panthers.  On Friday, they start with radio interviews, then make it to NFL Experience for fun, games, and rivalry.  At the end of the 50th Mile, they go to Super Bowl City for a wonderful coincidence.  Saturday takes them to a winery in the Napa Valley, then on to the NFL Honors award show.  On Sunday, it's what they've all been waiting for: the game itself.  B.W. the Broncos fan leaves happy; not so with Bobby Ray the Panthers fan as Denver wins 24-10.  (During the game, Bobby wears a GoPro camera for a unique perspective.)
#61 - Mar. 13, 2016: "This Is Progress!"
Former Miss Idealia Brandy returns to Stone Mountain to watch the latest pageant.  There, more history is made as fellow North Carolinian Rae'Janette Leak is crowned as the first-ever African-American winner.  She is overwhelmed by what she has witnessed: "Some years ago, this would have been completely unthinkable.  This is progress, personified!"  In a less serious development, Bobby Ray wears a Broncos T-shirt and a ballerina's dress to the family's weekly post-church dinner, a result of the Panthers' loss in Super Bowl 50.
#62 - Mar. 20, 2016: "Welcome Back, 'Bone"
Proving that even eternity can be temporary (if that's possible), Popeye decides to lift Hambone's suspension as a Christmas present.  He does so over Buddy Wayne's objection, but B.W. is eventually talked into resuming her usual job duties - milking "Ellie" and cleaning out the barn.  Still upset, 'Bone throws more of her free time into rehearsing her body percussion and setting up her new youth ministry.  While that goes on, her mother Annie and the rest of the Mommas' Club hold their next theme party, this time set in the 1980s.
#63 - Mar. 27, 2016: "9/11 Ain't No Joke"
Bobby Ray, Jennifer, and Belinda go on vacation to New York City.  One of the highlights was to visit the September 11 memorial so Belinda could learn more about the tragic events that occurred before Belinda was born.  But Jennifer and Belinda cry together and hug each other, while Bobby can barely hold it together.  Later, they travel to another memorial site, this one in western Pennsylvania honoring the heroes who defeated the terrorists on United Airlines Flight 93 while sacrificing their own lives.  Meanwhile, back home, Ralph and Hambone take publicity photos as outdoors "superheroes" Buck Hunter and Mudgirl.
#64 - Apr. 10, 2016: "King of the Jungle Book"
(There was no episode the previous week because of Easter.)
Bunky, whose nickname is "Mowgli" after the main character in The Jungle Book, becomes the youngest winner in the history of the World Freerunning Tour, with his win in Sydney, Australia.  The entire clan hears about it, congratulates him, and has big plans for when he returns home.  Meanwhile, in the U.S.: Belinda shows off her puppets at Jennifer's old high school in Charlotte, and Harvey gets the full VIP treatment from Ultimate Fighting Championship as he decides whether a MMA career is right for him.
#65 - Apr. 17, 2016: "And I'm Telling You I Am Leaving"
Hambone asks her boss for a leave of absence.  A baffled Buddy Wayne can barely understand it, but she explains that she wants to spend time with one of two "reality TV" families she met in her previous life: the Robertsons of Louisiana (Duck Dynasty) or the Browns of Alaska (Alaskan Bush People).  Hambone ensures everyone that this is temporary and she will return to the farm in a few months.  Earlier, her brother Harvey reveals that he has turned down a possible contract with UFC because his extended family needs him every day.

Sunday, May 27, 2018

Gone Barefoot show summaries (re-issue of season 4)

And now, here is my redone season 4.

#40 - Jan. 4, 2015: "Meadow Night Lights"
The new stadium at Meadow School hosts its first game, as the Meadow Indians alumni team takes on the Coats Yellowjackets.  The stadium is named for the Barefoot family, which donates $2 million to the county for construction costs.  Harvey makes his return to football playing for Meadow, while Hambone and Beth are on the sidelines as cheerleaders.  With time running out, "Lil' Jack," one of the cousins of the 13 residents of the house, intercepts a pass to seal the 27-24 win for the Indians.  We also meet Miss Hambone as a cheerleader and Bunky as a member of the marching band.
#41 - Jan. 11, 2015: "Beulah's Place"
B.W. and Popeye take a trip to the location in Meadow that was the site of Beulah Mae Morgan's orphanage; her service and generosity inspired one of B.W.'s hit songs, "The Ballad of Beulah Mae."  (Beulah Mae Morgan was a first cousin of B.W.'s great-grandfather John Noah.)  This show also has a Barefoot Moms' Club themed party, remembering the age of the "flappers" in the 1920s, and Bobby Ray talks about how he deals with working in a slaughterhouse.
#42 - Jan. 18, 2015: "It's Revival Time"
Ralph participates in a week-long special event simulating the church revivals that were common in rural areas in the previous human period.  He speaks to hundreds of people at the Mill Creek Church in Bentonville.  Also on the show, Bryson takes on Belinda in a fruit-picking contest, Harvey begins training for mixed martial arts, and Brittany Spears provides a video update about her daughter Lizzie.
#43 - Jan, 25, 2015: "Beautiful Barefoot Day"
B.W. explains the origin of the Barefoot last name and why going barefoot at all times is important to the family.  Meanwhile, the family overcomes the summer heat by holding a "beach party" on the pond, complete with belly flops, swimming, and playing in the mud.  At night, the family gathers at Bryson's treehouse for the unveiling of the poster that depicts the made-up movie Showdown at Las Positas.  In the “film,” Bryson plays the world’s youngest Western-style sheriff, who protects a town in the southwestern United States from outlaws.  A red carpet leads to the treehouse, which is decorated with all kinds of Western stuff.  Beth, a cousin of B.W.’s and expert baker, delivers a cake to share at the end of the meal, and B.W. and Popeye sing songs typical of those in period serials.
#44 - Feb. 8, 2015: "Life With Popeye"
(There was no episode the previous week due to Super Bowl XLIX.)
Buddy Wayne spends a day with Popeye and all 10 of his brothers and sisters at their home on state highway 50, about three miles from the farm.  They help with chores around the house and at the backyard farm, have dinner together, tell stories, and sing.  Also, Bunky explains and exhibits one of his favorite passions, called either parkour or freerunning; and another of the family cousins, Bret, takes us inside his life as a professional disc jockey.
#45 - Feb. 15, 2015: "Re-Generation"
Bunky, Hambone, and Brandy join dozens of cousins, aunts and uncles at the John Noah Youth Jam, a spin-off "family reunion" with separate events, one for school-aged children and another for teenagers and young adults.  While those of school age hang around the mud pit and treehouse and come home early, the older attendees play cornhole, volleyball, and other party games at a slumber party highlighted by a "lip rock" performance by a group called the Honey Bees, which includes Hambone and five friends.  (A "lip rock" is one in which a large group of performers mouth the words to a popular song with elaborate choreography.)  The show also features businesses owned by two of the attendees and distant relatives of B.W.: cousin Beth's bakery and aunt Ola's photography shop.
#46 - Mar. 1, 2015: "Meet Our Hidden Families"
(There was no show the previous week due to the 87th Academy Awards.)
Ralph, Harvey, and Brenda reveal that they were husbands and parents in their previous lives, and make trips to see them.  Ralph goes to the Batten Farm in Selma to see his wife, Ellender, and their three teenage children.  He recounts his ministry trips around the world and teaches the Batten children how to farm using the traditional methods he learned overseas and at home.  Harvey, who was a husband, father, and grandfather, sees his wife Rena Stephenson and other relatives at their home in Elevation.  Finally, Brenda meets the father of her first child, James Lockamy, for the first time since Bryson was born and eventually died early.  She is surprised but happy to see him, and she is completely forgiven.
#47 - Mar. 8, 2015: "The World Is Waiting"
Brandy and Bunky get the good news: They've been cast for The Amazing Race, CBS' long-standing reality TV series!  As they pack up for the start of the season, Ralph holds a special service to pray for their well-being as they travel and compete.  Brandy admits to high expectations for the team: "If we don't win this season, we'll call it a failure."  But the rest of the clan is not to be outdone: Jennifer begins work on the second book in the Ella Littlebridge series, Hambone turns Halloween into a friends' night out, and Bryson scores his first touchdown in flag football.
#48 - Mar. 15, 2015: "Big Bucks, Double Whammy"
Buddy Wayne, Hambone, Popeye, Ralph, Harvey, and Bobby Ray join nine others in the extended family for Camp Paradise's largest hunting trip ever.  After a day trying to pin down bucks and other woodland creatures, it's time for a huge party around the fire, centered on "bonfire barbecue" and beer.  Hambone tries to make B.W. and Ralph drink, which make them both uncomfortable.  When the day ends, the rest of the party returns home but Hambone tries her hand at belly flopping.
#49 - Mar. 22, 2015: "Here, There, Everywhere"
Harvey makes his debut as a mixed martial arts performer at Smithfield-Selma High School. Brenda participates in the Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Circus at PNC Arena in Raleigh, but first attends "clown college" in Florida.  Finally, Bobby Ray, Jennifer, and Belinda travel to an Army base in South Korea to watch a college basketball game.
#50 - Mar. 29, 2015: "Glory Days"
Buddy Wayne was a point guard in basketball while attending high school, and on this episode he returns to the court.  It's the annual rivalry game against Benson, and as is often the case in a sports event B.W. is involved in, something dramatic happens.  After trailing by as many as 22 points in the middle of the first half, the Indians rally back at the end for the biggest comeback win in school history!  Before that, B.W. watches Brittany Pittman of North Johnston score 61 points, a record for anyone playing in the school gym.
#51 - Apr. 12, 2015: "One Wrong Turn"
(There was no episode the previous week due to Easter.)
Brandy and Bunky appears as guests on an all-female talk show hosted by Brenda, Annie and Jennifer.  There, they reveal that their dream appearance on The Amazing Race comes to an end when they are eliminated after five legs of the 11 that were run.  It doesn't help that another team U-turns them, forcing them to complete both detours.  Brenda also invites pen-pal Lulu Plumpkin on the show to discuss her incredible story.
#52 - Apr. 19, 2015: "Saved by the Bell"
Hambone runs her first pay-per-view as head honcho of Ultimate Championship Wrestling.  It's a night of incredible matches, climaxing with a once-in-a-lifetime finish to the main event match - Big (actually a cousin, Dwayne Hinson) beats One Man Gang after a belly flop from near the roof of the arena!  But this episode also shares the drama she had to endure along the way, both with her promotion and her life in general.  Hambone shares exclusive details about her two failed pregnancies, one a miscarriage at an early stage and another a stillbirth that required a Caesarean section.  She also had a failed trucking business and resorted to having to work as a cook in the food services division of a public school district.

Gone Barefoot show summaries (re-issue of season 3)

As promised, here's what season 3 now looks like.

#27/28 - Jan. 5, 2014: "The Pink Party" (2 hours)
The Barefoot-Johnston County Family Reunion, the official name of the "Pink Party," takes place at the old Barefoot Cemetery site on Eldridge Road in Dunn.  The first hour chronicles the incredible transformation of the 30-acre site to the location of one of the biggest single-family events in the state of North Carolina.  Days in advance, food is prepared, a dozen seating benches are set up around a huge tent, the main dining room becomes a formal ballroom and banquet room, and even the remaining farmland is turned into a simulation of a late-19th century fairground.  The second hour is a parade of characters and a beehive of activity that starts in the morning and goes well into the night.  Popeye upsets the ladies at bunco, two meals - an informal lunch and a formal dinner - are served, some of your favorite characters show their talents, and everyone dances the night away.  And somehow, the cleanup was completed in time for church services the next morning.  But - where did Hambone go?
#29/30 - Jan. 12, 2014: "Bad Bone, Good Girls" (2 hours)
The cliffhanger surrounding Hambone's whereabouts early in the morning of the family reunion is resolved.  It is revealed that she slipped out of the all-ages formal dance without telling anyone else, took off her formal clothes, slipped into redneck gear, and spent the rest of the night with the Camp Paradise cousins in a pine forest behind the property.  After seeing her with bloodshot eyes, B.W. gives her a verbal warning against any further action in the future.  Also on the show, Brandy ends her reign as Miss Idealia and watches Megan Turnipseed (former BMN Superfan contestant) win the crown; the show also honors Tonya McBrookins, a black woman from Louisiana who was allowed to enter the pageant in the 1960s, despite the rampant discrimination in the South at the time; she made the live finale only to be pulled under immense pressure from the region's political and business leaders.
#31 - Jan. 19, 2014: "More Big Doings"
With her time as a beauty queen officially over, Brandy enrolls in Lena Peacock's ballroom dancing school just north of the Peacocks Crossroads junction of state routes 50 and 96.  There, she develops a crush on a boy from eastern N.C. named Hylton Tripp.  Also, Brenda is the special guest speaker at a church the Raynors (her side of the family) has attended for generations.  Finally, Annie puts the finishing touches on her new book and prepares for a tour to promote it.
#32 - Jan. 26, 2014: "Dream House"
The treehouse project has been completed and Bryson excitedly moves in.  The house contains two chairs, a small bed, a workbench, and large spaces for play.  On opening day, Noah invites all the kids who attend the one-room schoolhouse to Bryson's new home.  Before too long, Belinda moves in with her dolls and Popeye launches a TV show from there.  In addition, B.W. ends the season as player/coach on the Meadow Indians basketball team.  Finally, Brenda shares her recipe for barbeque ribs with "all-in-one" sauce.
#33 - Mar. 9, 2014: "Superfan Winner"
(This show followed a five-week suspension due to Super Bowl XLVIII, the 2014 Winter Olympics, and the 86th Academy Awards.)
Brittany Ramos, winner of BMN Superfan, spends five days in the family home, participating in various tasks, activities, and events.  This hour chronicles the week and gives details of season 2 of the reality TV competition.
#34 - Mar. 16, 2014: "Bi Jove!"
Billy Bob and Krista Ribble come in all the way from Texas with a gift for the family: a "bi-horn," which is a hybrid creature combining a bison (commonly mislabeled as buffalo) and Longhorn steer.  The Ribbles have been pen pals of B.W. for some months.  Also, Brenda is in Memphis, TN to do a photo shoot and interview for a magazine, and Bryson and friends use the briar patch for a big game of hide-and-seek.
#35 - Mar. 23, 2014: "You Can Hear the Bells"
Preparations for the renewal of vows are in full swing.  On the groom's side, the usual bachelor party is replaced by a church service and Southern gospel performance.  Meanwhile, the Spears family holds a bridal shower with traditional music, games, and stories of the Ulster-Scot Appalachians before the attendees start the 430-mile trip to North Carolina via traditional methods.  The bride, groom, bridesmaids, and groomsmen all have their clothes handmade, mostly by Brenda and Annie.
#36/37 - Mar. 30, 2014: "The Circle Is Unbroken"
After five years together and four as a married couple, Buddy Wayne and Brittany Raylene renew their vows and hold the formal ceremony they have always wanted.  Their daughter Lizzie serves as the ring girl, Ralph brings the two back into marriage, and Hambone acts up again, pretending to object to the wedding then saying that she was just kidding.  At the reception, the first dance occurs to the music of their hit song "When the Bough Breaks."  The farm house hosts the wedding, while Long Branch hosts the reception.
#38/39 - Apr. 6, 2014: "Together In All Seasons"
In the first hour, B.W. and Brittany take their honeymoon on an eight-day cruise of the Caribbean.  They are welcomed on shore by Bertland McSween, the unofficial king of the region and the mayor of the revived city of Port Royal, Jamaica, and local music star Battimamzelle performs.  For the second hour, the couple take the "Ultimate Christmas Trip," starting at Rockefeller Center in New York City, then visiting a Christkindlmarkt and castle in southern Germany, and ending at the site in Bethlehem where Jesus Christ was born.

Saturday, May 12, 2018

Gone Barefoot show summaries (re-issue of season 2)

And now here is what season 2 would look like.

#14 - Jan. 6. 2013: "Checkers or Wreckers"
The premiere of season 2 takes place at the new short-track made of red clay dirt in Bentonville, the town in Johnston County which had been known as site of one of the last major battles of the Civil War.  B.W. climbs into a 1930s-vintage race car and competes against other local drivers in a 150-lap main event.  After a night of beating, banging, and bad tempers, the race ends unlike any other in motorsports history!  We also see flashbacks from a pre-race visit B.W. makes to the Singing Grove in Benson, where his fans celebrated his NASCAR championships and reality-show music competition success.
#15 - Jan. 13, 2013: "Perfect Harmony"
Three of the boys launch a new Southern gospel music singing group, as Popeye, Ralph, and Harvey start the Barefoot Boys.  When Bobby Ray declines to join them, Popeye walks all over the neighborhood to try to find the fourth singer, until Landon Jr. (Alonzo's nephew) says yes, and the group starts rehearsals.  Also, Harvey returns to football by joining the local team of Meadow High School alumni, and Ralph updates work on renovating the church.
#16 - Jan. 20, 2013: "School Daze"
Belinda and Bryson are transferred from the Meadow School to the new family-based Overshot School, a one-room facility located on Meadowbrook Road.  Buddy Wayne drops him off on the first day, and learns more from teacher/uncle Noah and his wife Elma.  (By the way, all 21 students are related to him: his brother, his niece, 11 cousins, and eight aunts and uncles.)  Also, Popeye discovers the dice game called bunco and finds he's very good at it, and .
#17 - Jan. 27, 2013: "Bible Bowl"
TV host Jack Gray brings his classic game show "Bible Bowl" to Ralph's Long Branch church, and Hambone joins some friends for a girls-vs.-boys matchup.  The outcome hinges on a crucial final question!  Also on the show, Annie finds a professional purpose for the house's mud pit and Bunky celebrates his birthday.
#18 - Feb. 10, 2013: "There She Is!"
(There was no episode the previous week due to Super Bowl XLVII.)
Brandy enters the Miss Idealia pageant as part of the Confederate Fall Festival.  Her immediate family (Bunky, parents Daniel and Laurie, and brother Blake), and also her coach Annie, travel to Stone Mountain, GA to watch her compete against representatives of other Southern farm families.  They meet CSA president Lyman Bowling Jr. and his family at the Idealia mansion at which they live, participate in the Harvest Parade, then go into the high-stakes contest.  Brandy wears a one-piece swimsuit despite great reluctance, rocks a homemade gown, and shows off her ballroom dancing skills.  In the end, it all comes down to a very tense moment on stage.
#19 - Feb. 17, 2013: "Welcome to the Family!"
Beth, a baker and cousin of many of the family members, announces that she and her boyfriend Trey Johnson are adopting a son, Jordan.  A party is held to welcome Jordan and many of the 13 are in attendance.  But these aren't the only adoptions, as Melinda - another cousin - finds "forever homes" for many lost dogs.  Meanwhile, Ralph attends a fund-raising for a church charity in Arkansas and meets fellow TV star Willie Robertson.
#20 - Feb. 24, 2013: "Reign on Me"
Brandy performs the usual duties of a reigning beauty queen and keeps a diary along the way.  Among the events she attends are the opening of a new communal farm house at the site of a former military base in Georgia, the World Cotton Picking Championship in Mississippi, and the famed hollering contest in Spivey's Corner (not far from the family farm).  Among the contest entries is James Minson Barefoot, a fourth cousin of hers.  "It's crazy, I just can't get rid of that name," notes Brandy.
#21 - Mar. 3, 2013: "Hunting History"
For the first time, a woman is invited to what had been an all-male ritual: the daylong social hunting event.  Hambone is rewarded for both her earlier effort in the skeet shooting challenge and her interest in the "redneck" lifestyle by tagging along with Ralph, Harvey, and Bobby Ray to go after whitetail deer and "roadkill" animals (e.g. squirrel and possum).  Also, Popeye's brother Labell visits the house with his wife Allene and all 20(!) of their children.  Finally, B.W. and Brenda consent to have a specialist assess Bryson's educational development; they are concerned about delays due to his being reborn as a seven-year-old after he had earlier died in infancy.
#22 - Mar. 10, 2013: "Milestone Day"
Family and friends gather to celebrate the debut of Jennifer's new book, Black Crow in the Window.   As she promised, it combines elements of history, detective drama, and romance.  The case takes place in early 20th century New Orleans; Ella Littlebridge tries to find a local version of Jack the Ripper in the notorious Storyville section as jazz is being created and falls in love with Beau Brummell Young, a handsome mulatto.  Also, the results of Bryson's assessment are in; it is recommended that Bryson drop out of regular school for more instruction at home until he reaches appropriate grade levels.  Finally, B.W. announces that he plans to renew his wedding vows to his long-distance wife Brittany Spears (a bluegrass singer known professionally as Brittany Raylene).
#23 - Mar. 17, 2013: "The Crafty Life"
The Barefoots prepare the house for winter by canning fruits and vegetables that they have gleaned from the farm and the briar patch and making quilts, blankets, and even socks and other footwear (in case being barefoot becomes uncomfortable).  Meanwhile, work begins on designing the treehouse for Bryson, as B.W. and Bryson tell Harvey their design ideas, and the moms assemble Thanksgiving and Christmas crafts.
#24 - Mar. 24, 2013: "The Roots of Man"
To commemorate the start of hunting season, B.W., Popeye, Ralph, and Bobby Ray spend a weekend replicating the hunting and gathering lifestyle that dates back to the beginning of humanity.  They even dress up in loincloths and wear animal bones; Ralph quips that "the only things we didn't see were dinosaurs."  Also, Bryson is re-tested and this time he is allowed to join the other students at Noah's school; and Bunky is taught the "Southern accent" by Hambone and Annie.
#25/26 - Apr. 7, 2013: "Brittany and Buddy: A Love Story" (2 hours)
(There was no episode the previous week because of Easter.)
Here, Brittany Raylene tells her life story about growing up in rural Kentucky with a family of bluegrass performers, how she met B.W., and how they had to elope due to both family's disapproval (the Barefoots due to Buddy's earlier divorce, and the Spears' due to her age).  Now living with their separate clans, the two reunite in North Carolina for Thanksgiving.  By the end of the show, they agree to renew their wedding vows because, as Brittany says, "we all would like the chance to get it right."

Gone Barefoot show summaries (re-issue of season 1)

As promised, here is the revised season 1 show summary list.  I basically took the eight episodes of "season 1" and the first five of "season 2" and put them together.

From this point forward, the idea is that 13 episodes aired per season and that new seasons started with the calendar year.  That is because it was linked to a fictitious TV channel, BFT (Barefoot Family Television, formerly BMN TV), which I "launched" on Jan. 1, 2012.

Episode numbers are for the entire series.  Eventually, they will be numbered from 1 to 91, as in 13 episodes over 7 seasons, 2012 to 2018.

#1 - Jan. 1, 2012: "Meet the Family"
Buddy Wayne Barefoot is raptured into Heaven and goes through the Great Tribulation and Millennium periods.  Once that occurs, he is welcomed to his new home in rural North Carolina by guardian angel Mary Elizabeth "Biddy" McBiddlewhiskers.  B.W. is then introduced to his new eternal family.  In all, 11 people are introduced, but Biddy teases that there's someone else he wants B.W. to meet.  After the usual televised tension, the 13th family member is revealed to be Bryson, B.W.'s stillborn brother, prompting one of the most famous lines in reality TV history: "My Bryson is back!"  A welcome feast and prayer session ends the episode.
#2 - Jan. 8, 2012: "It's Our House"
A tour of the new house is shown, emphasizing the features that make it a traditional rural American house.  Among other things, there is no electricity, running water, or indoor plumbing.  However, a home irrigation system is installed.  We also find that sleep can be uncomfortable in the Barefoot household, as six bedrooms are somehow crammed into a small space and Hambone has to sleep in the barn due to being the odd person out.
#3 - Jan. 15, 2012: "It's Planting Time"
B.W. hand-sows the ceremonial first seeds of the season.  Later, he shows us the barn where there are not only animals, but also primitive farm equipment pulled by mules and other animals.  Belinda and Bryson pluck fruit from the orchards, while Harvey establishes the workshop on the second floor of the dwelling.
#4 - Jan. 22, 2012: "Outside and In"
Brenda, Jennifer, Annie, and Brandy establish the Barefoot Moms' Club for social interaction; they immediately start a quilting club.  Annie also establishes an in-house beauty parlor in which all the makeups, hair treatments, and shampoos are made from natural ingredients.  Also, Bryson and Belinda start school at the Meadow School facility; it's a temporary location while a one-room schoolhouse is planned for them and their relatives.
#5 - Jan. 29, 2012: "Shootin' the Breeze"
When the days' work is done, the dining room becomes the site of storytelling, games, and talent exhibitions as the family makes up its own fun.  At the end, B.W. sings "Poor Ol' Mule" on her guitar and Hambone performs the body percussion that led to her nickname.  Also on the show: Popeye, the family historian, seeks public records from Johnston County to answer questions about the past, and Jennifer shows the skills she learned as a podiatrist.
#6 - Feb. 12, 2012: "Just One of the Boys"
(There was no episode the previous week due to Super Bowl XLVI.)
Ralph, who is skeptical of Hambone's redneck ways, challenges his sister to a contest of shooting a .45-caliber rifle at clay pigeon targets.  The contest has some simple stakes: whoever loses has to wash all the clothes on a pre-arranged day that Brenda has off.  It all comes down to the final shot!  Meanwhile, Brenda finds a battery-powered radio and cassette player to listen to her favorite songs, and B.W. visits Brandon McLamb, his publicist, who lives on a nearby property.
#7 - Feb. 19, 2012: "Worth a Hill of Beans"
At the end of the fall, B.W. grows his first crop of bean blossoms, which aren't really blossoms at all but more closely resembles broccoli.  Flush with that success, he finds wild versions of wheat and corn at a nearby briar patch, which surprises him because he had been told such crops were extinct.  Ralph washes the dishes after his loss the previous week and wears a woman's apron while doing it, and Brandy and Hambone begin to do battle while milking their cows.
#8 - Feb. 26, 2012: "Smellie and Booger"
Belinda has a dollhouse, which we take a look at for the first time.  And what a time for it: the nine-year-old prodigy is organizing a "marriage" of two of her favorite dolls: Sarah Michelle MacSmelliefoote and Benjamin Jeremiah Boogerberger.  It's filled with moments both hilarious and dramatic.  Also, Brandy finishes her first homemade piece of clothing, and a hollering exhibition is followed by a ceremonial hog-killing.
#9 - Mar. 4, 2012: "Branchin' Out"
Ralph purchases the Long Branch church two blocks from the family property, and moves services there.  The opening is attended by all 13 residents as well as dozens of their distant kin and their friends.  The Barefoot Boys perform vintage hymns, and everyone dresses in American colonial-to-Civil-War era costumes.  Also on the show, Hambone comes together with some new friends to play Bible trivia.
#10 - Mar. 11, 2012: "Are We In or Are We Out"
The Barefoot Moms' Club runs its first-ever fashion show!  They are joined by several guests to show off what they have designed.  In the spirit of the close-knit traditional community, the designers model their own clothes as the common room is turned into a runway.  In addition, Bobby Ray introduces us to some of the family's prized farm animals, and Popeye visits the former home of his great-great-grandfather, "Pink" Barefoot; the former cemetery is now his immediate family's home and is used for extended clan and community events.
#11 - Mar. 18, 2012: "It Only Looks Scary"
The Barefoot family celebrates October Harvest and Heritage Day.  It's like Halloween, without the scary parts or Satanic references.  They do dress in costumes and tell stories of how they either died or nearly died during their original time on Earth.  As part of the festivities, B.W., Brenda, Bobby Ray, and Jennifer take a hayride; meanwhile, Bryson marks the day by joining some male classmates in tying up teacher Shirley Mae Crabtree as a prank.
#12 - Mar. 25, 2012: "Giving Thanks"
For the first time, "the 13" celebrate Thanksgiving.  In the largest gathering to date, all of the rest of the immediate families are there, with the glaring exception of Alfred, Buddy and Bobby's father, who unfortunately went to Hell.  The usual elements are there: large amounts of food, storytelling, and entertainment.  We also see Brenda's insider tips on preparing the perfect holiday meal, and Ralph runs his first service at the church he now owns.
#13 - Apr. 1, 2012: "Our First Christmas"
This time, "the 13" are joined by only a few distant relatives and family friends.  All the traditions are observed: special message about the birth of Jesus Christ, a formal dinner, a performance of carols from the Barefoot Boys, and gifts.  B.W., for example, gets a replica NASCAR race car resembling that which will debut in the 2013 Sprint Cup Series season.  To top it all off, Biddy arranges for them to speak to Jesus Himself!

Saturday, March 17, 2018

My plan to shut down "Gone Barefoot" and re-organize episode summaries

As I posted a month ago, I wanted to re-focus my efforts on any news related to the Barefoot characters.  So, in that spirit, here is something of major importance that I wish to share:  The Gone Barefoot "reality TV" series I created would now be in its seventh and final season.

I set the debut date as Jan. 1, 2012, and the plan was to create 13 episodes each year.  I have later decided to cut the series off at seven seasons, as seven has traditionally used in the Bible to denote completeness - for example, the seventh day of rest after God created the heavens and the Earth.  Therefore, the series will end after 91 (13 x 7) episodes.

Although I have posted the show summaries before - type in the "Gone Barefoot" phrase in the search box to read them - I realize that I now have to re-organize the episodes so that they fit into 13 episodes each.  I plan to start that process sometime in the next week, and post the new summaries later this spring.

(DVD cover created in Nabawia Oliveira's InDesign class, ABC Adult School, 2013)


Sunday, February 18, 2018

Dream Season simulation won't be published

After some consideration, and with reluctance on my part, I have decided that the NASCAR dream season simulation that I am still in the process of finishing will not be made public.  This will be for my own enjoyment and amusement, and for three reasons:
  • The original dream season summaries that I created cannot easily be found online.  They were created some nine years ago, and although the forum it was on still exists, I simply don't have the time or effort to find it again.
  • I am busy contributing to other websites like the forum spun off from the506 site which covers sports broadcasting (and begun with NFL maps), so I think that should be my public persona for now.  Heck, I have tweeted only infrequently in the last few months, haven't posted on Facebook in quite some time, and haven't created a new YouTube video in three years!
  • Most importantly, I want to re-focus any new posts to this blog on the Barefoot family characters.  Oh, since I'm thinking about, maybe the next post should be B.W. standing next to a replica of a U.S. Legends Cars race-car with the vintage Dale Earnhardt #3 look, which I would create by importing an Adobe Photoshop program.  That would be timely, given that Austin Dillon drove car #3 to victory at the Daytona 500 today.

Thank you for your patience and understanding.