It's the comparison chart between Brittany Spears, one of my other favorite characters, and Britney Spears. I originally composed this in 2007, so the ages are as of that time.
Full name | Britney Jean Spears | Brittany Lynnette Spears |
Hometown | Kentwood, Louisiana | Beattyville, Kentucky |
Age | 25 | 17 |
Music style | Pop/R&B | Bluegrass |
Parents | Jamie and Lynne (estranged) | Blanton and Rebecca (happily married) |
Husbands/boyfriends | Married and divorced twice; two kids from second marriage | Has a secret boyfriend (psst, it's Buddy Wayne Barefoot) |
Career start | Mickey Mouse Club | Parents' basement |
Signed by... | Business manager Louis Pearlman | Race car driver Buddy Wayne Barefoot |
Debut album released | 1998 | 2007 |
Album title | Hit Me Baby One More Time | Tales of a Jillbilly |
Backup performers | Session acts (no names available) | Brothers Bunch, Blanton and Bradshaw; sister Bailey; cousin Brashears |
Intended audience | Pop music lovers, horny men 18-49 | The whole family! |
Movie crossovers | Starred in Crossroads (remember that?) | None |
Outrageous moments | Shaving her hair bald, lesbian-kissing, going to a public bathroom barefoot, and so many more | None (as far as we know) |
Rehab visits | Several (in one week!) | None |
Biggest professional problem | Where does one begin? | Her name on Wikipedia redirects to Britney's page |
Overall image | Girl gone wild | Girl next door you want to marry |
Does she exist? | Yes (unfortunately!) | No (unfortunately!) |
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